September 9, 2021 - One decade... be present.

It’s been a decade since I got sick. I didn’t know then, that night, that my life was dramatically changed. I’ve done therapies, and they’ve...

January 26th, 2019 why I share my story


I chose this picture not just because it's lovely - it's also winding, & there's lots of small steps... & balance


My CBT therapist, Christina, told me that trauma changes your brain & I believe her. I also believe that your brain tries to make sense of what's happening, & suspect that's what happened to me the night I got sick.

I like having answers - I think most people do - but I had no idea how long it would take me to get all of my answers.  The final piece was a little over a year ago, when I realized I have PTSD anxiety - one of the changes to my brain (the other 2 being vestibular migraine, & convergence insufficiency - a vision disorder)... I was initially only diagnosed with benign paroxysmal positional vertigo - BPPV - which was finally successfully treated about 10 months after I got sick.

Why do I share about all of this in my blog? Why am I not private about it? While I don't share everything, I do share a good deal, & here's why -

1) it's exhausting, draining to keep secrets about what affects my life on a daily basis.

2) my writing helps me put the pieces together, & hopefully helps someone else - I know how hungry *I* was for info... I've shared Luis Carlos Montalvan's story on my FB page because it was from listening to his book that I realized *I* had developed PTSD anxiety as a result of my illness.

3) People talk about all sorts of medical conditions - why not also be comfortable talking about mine? I'm realizing more & more how my Anxiety impacts my perception, my thinking - I'm slowly learning how to respond. If you want to know about one of my disorders, ask me - if I'm not comfortable, or don't have an answer, I'll say so.

4) People need to respond with compassion & kindness, empathy (putting oneself in someone else's shoes) to those with invisible disorders/disabilities - & understanding hopefully makes that a bit easier.

5) I give you snapshots of my process, & a life worth living, with disabilities. I talk about my therapies - my neurological rehab - because they're a large part of my life.





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