February 28th 2016 About my Feldenkrais Therapy....

February 28th 2016 About my Feldenkrais Therapy....

People hear about traditional vestibular rehab therapy - VRT - fairly frequently when there is discussion about non-surgical treatment.  Yo...

October 21st, 2018 getting real

I looked up the definition of the word realistic - this is what I found -

     1.  having or showing a sensible and practical idea of what can be achieved or expected.
2.  representing familiar things in a way that is accurate or true to life.

I have disabilities - I don't use that word much, but it's true... that's the box I check on the taxi coupons I use - "disabled rider"... I feel like owning my disabilities is healthy, not about giving in. 

Here are some of my realities -
1) I don't drive, & I think it's unlikely I will again.

2) I'm no longer a performing, teaching flutist, tho I still play my flute.

3) I don't travel, & it's unlikely I will again. I'm able to visit my parents, & other family by car.

4) I'm trying to do more with my husband Ron.

5) I read - & LOVE - the comic strip MUTTS, as well as headlines in our local paper, and the headings of some newsletters. I've gone thru a couple Lands'End catalogs, and then gotten help from Ron to make purchases.

6) I'm very limited re my computer usage, tho I've learned how to use my iPad to listen to audiobooks.

7) I draw, play our piano keyboard, & occasionally connect by phone with friends/family.

8) I'm able to do some ordinary but necessary household tasks (i.e. cooking, laundry).

9) I'm interested in advocacy - speaking out about vestibular and vision disorders - specifically migraine associated vertigo (MAV), & convergence insufficiency (CI) (eye teaming).  I'm thinking about what more I can do, how I can better educate people. 

10) I do neurological rehab - Vision Therapy & Feldenkrais - & plan to take a break in 2 months, when my daughters are on Winter Break.

I need to own my invisible disorders, which means talking about how my symptoms feel, not hiding.  Explaining to those who are interested, & will listen. Putting a face on these disorders makes them real.  *I* am here.

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October 19th, 2018 disappointments, frustrations, but keep looking

Being positive doesn't mean shutting out feelings - I'm human... Energy - or lack of it - getting tired, is a problem for me... I spoke with someone who told me what programs/classes are available thru senior centers - I don't FEEL like a senior, but at 57 I guess I'm on the edge... but I'm not ready for most of what's available - I ended up feeling overwhelmed & a bit defeated... I didn't tell her much about my health situation - I'm finding that people often don't really want details.

I told myself that once upon a time I never would have had that conversation, that reaching out is a good thing... Trouble is there's often disappointment... It occurs to me, there ARE going to be a lot of disappointments, but I have to keep going.

I hope I can build up my stamina... not easy to do, and in the meantime, I need to keep looking, to figure out what I can do NOW. 

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October 17th, 2018 Is it #1 or #2 - Worry, that is...

I decided to make myself a sign, because I think stopping, and recognizing which kind of worry it is, is important. 

When I Googled Worry 1 vs Worry 2, I got a lot of info re worry vs anxiety, but no good definitions of these 2 kinds of worry, which surprised me.  There's an important distinction in the field of treatment of anxiety, regarding these two kinds of worry.

Worry 1 - this is a real, actual problem - could be long term, short term, big, small, in between, whatever - but it's real, and hopefully can be fixed, or at least minimized and/or managed.

Worry 2 - this is not an actual problem, it's worrying about something that COULD happen.

Sometimes there's things you can do to prevent the likelihood of something happening.  This can make a lot of sense - safety rules are a great example of this. But there's no way to predict for sure what will happen. 

Letting go of a worry 2 isn't easy, but doing what I can in the moment, is really all I can do.  The only thing I really have control over is myself, in this moment.

Photo credit - Ron

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