February 28th 2016 About my Feldenkrais Therapy....

February 28th 2016 About my Feldenkrais Therapy....

People hear about traditional vestibular rehab therapy - VRT - fairly frequently when there is discussion about non-surgical treatment.  Yo...

February 7th, 2018 Medication/mental health update...

Overall, people like that I'm keeping this conversation going, so.... I like Dr. Mirsky, my psychiatrist - he's getting to know me, and explains things well...

For now, I'll stay at 20 mg of Prozac, because he says I haven't been at that level long enough to know if it's right for me... if not, he'll slowly increase... I'm now going up to 7.5 mg of mirtazapine - technically the lowest dose (previously, I was splitting pills).... this can also go higher if needed...  Mirtazapine is an antidepressant which works well with Prozac, and helps with sleep and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)... so that's all good...

he emphasized that he wants to keep on going low and slow, because I'm not having trouble with side effects and he wants to keep it that way...he said again that this is a process...

Dr. Mirsky said he felt I'd improved - my awareness is better, and we talked about various stuff going on with me... he also emphasized that he really wants me doing cognitive behavioral therapy - CBT - with my mental health therapist... he feels strongly, based on what happened to me, and how I experience anxiety that this modality is key... I plan to talk more with my therapist about this... I understand that anxious thinking can become a sort of habit, and what to do, once there's awareness, is important...

Sleep, mood, CBT - this could all help me with my disorders... So, it's a bit scary to say this "out loud," - I'm still a bit skeptical - but I'm starting to feel a possibility of hope...



Leave a comment

January 14th, 2018 Speaking my truth; the depth of my loss...

An e-mail from my mother encouraged these words to spill out of me, and I decided to share them...
I don't know if I could have performed after recovery from my hand surgeries, but I could have given private flute lessons... getting sick changed that... teaching - which I loved - along with a number of other large goals, now seems unlikely...

I love the sound of the flute, and I don't want to stop playing, but I desperately miss picking up sheet music and playing, particularly with other musicians...

I will always be a mom, but my daughters are growing up and will find their own way - as they should - and need me less... I love them, I'm proud of them, but still I want it to be otherwise, because *I* am not moving on as I envisioned... and in reality, I can talk with them, but am very limited in terms of what I can DO with them...

I'm also very limited in what I can DO with my husband...

This is all very painful.... I don't feel bitter - that word just doesn't fit - but I DO feel angry and incredibly sad...

I hope with every fiber of my being that doing artistic stuff will not only help, but be satisfying - not just a time filler.... there's nothing I do that feels good that takes a great deal of time... due to pacing, it can't...

When my current therapist first said to me "getting sick was life altering for you..." I'd never heard that before... since then I've thought, "yeah, yeah, let's move on... I don't want to go there..." but it's TRUE...


I don't want false promises about what I'll be able to do... getting sick was a devastating blow... I KNOW I need to create some kind of life... but I ALSO need to feel - even on meds, and CBT -  the depth of my loss.....

2 Comments

January 3rd, 2018 Mental health update - meds and CBT...

I decided to keep sharing updates re my mental health... privacy does nothing for the stigma of the Anxiety and Depression that often accompany vision and vestibular disorders...

I spoke with my psychiatrist, Dr. Mirsky... I like him - he's a decent guy, and really knows his meds... I updated him, and he discussed the possibility of a med for sleep (that would compliment Prozac) which is an issue for me - Anxiety can hit me hard in the wee hours - but ultimately decided to try raising my Prozac... this will be done in weekly micro-dosing, to get me up to 15 or 20 mg.... he said the first month (which I handled) was the hardest - he's confident I'll be OK... I said I was skeptical, and he said that's part of the Anxiety... if I have problems, I'll shoot him an e-mail, and I see him again in a month...

He also mentioned - because of my migraine/blood sugar diet - my need for glucose (for my brain), and was happy about my apple intake... I also take Cod Liver Oil...


Finally, he stressed that he wants me doing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - CBT and meds are the proven treatment for Anxiety/Depression... hoping my current mental health therapist has the skills... will find out...

Leave a comment
© 2014 Tamar Schwartz, Visible Person Invisible Problem (VPIP). Powered by Blogger.

Search

Swedish Greys - a WordPress theme from Nordic Themepark. Converted by LiteThemes.com.