I'd begun wondering if I was right
about the synergy - and I looked up the definition -
"the
interaction or cooperation of two or more organizations, substances, or other
agents to produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate
effects."
My mistake about my synergy - in my case, all
my therapies working together - was thinking it would now be an even, upward
slope - no more zigs and zags to my rehab.
Today I had to take a taxi to and from vision
therapy - VT. I always get texts when the taxi is on its' way. I was done with my session, and got the text.
Then I saw a taxi driving back and forth right past the building. My first thought was "Oh my God, it's
gonna leave, I'll have to order another one, shit!".
Then I remembered from a different taxi ride,
that I'd figured out the driver's cell phone number is embedded in the text. My
first thought was "I can't do this" but then I just kind of DID it - I took out my phone, accessed the text, and
called - he picked up, and I ended up in the taxi.
I was still anxious and stressed, but also a
bit surprised that I had done it. I said
to myself "that was hard, but you did it, & now you're on your way
home."
There ARE gonna be times - like the Shabbat
service with the video clips - when I'll be too challenged, and have to accommodate,
and say to myself "yup, this is too much for me right now." But there will ALSO be times when I'm
challenged, and CAN do it.
Acceptance and synergy are NOT mutually exclusive.
Neurological rehab is never a straight
line. I know Dr. Margolis (developmental optometrist) reads my posts - he
actually told me - but I'm glad I'll have a chance to talk with him soon, as I
continue moving forward. Making progress still feels a bit scary, but it also
feels good.
