I looked at a post written
May 16th, 2018 (My positive List), & saw how far I've come in a little over
a year. It's important for me to see this. It's also important for me to recognize
that I'm not going to do things exactly the way I did prior to getting sick, so
a slightly different mindset matters.
People like to have
stories with endings, with neatly packaged words of wisdom - life lessons if
you will - delivered. I really can't offer that. What I can offer is a window
into how I approach my life situation, my problem solving.
I am committed to
continuing to do my home therapy vision exercises, as well as my Feldenkrais. I
will try things that feel worthwhile to me - doing things purely to fill time
doesn't feel good.
I'll do what I can to
continue to build my stamina.
I want to fulfill my responsibilities
as best I can.
I don't do the musical
activities I once did, which provided a rich network - it's time for me to move
on. I don't know if I'll find new
activities outside my home, but much of what I do for enjoyment is solitary - fulfilling,
but solitary.
I need to find a new social
circle, an in-person social network, people who understand & are supportive
of my health situation. I'm grateful for my family, & for the friends I do
talk to, but I need something more.
I'll need to figure this
out. I'll start looking for a support
group by talking with my therapists, & anyone else who may be helpful.
Why haven't you pursued making music with Jake?
ReplyDeleteI've never done improv with anyone, & it would only be for like 5 min... I'll see what he says
ReplyDelete