NOTE: Please copy and paste into Google Translate to
listen if needed.
Everyone's got stress in their lives, but realistically,
some have more stress than others. I
think it's safe to say that dealing with invisible disorders guarantees some
days when the stress level - whether it's fear, anxiety, whatever - gets a bit
high. There are situations that are
stressful - because of how I am challenged, how demanding something feels to me
- that simply are not typically
stressful to others. So I've been
thinking about ways to manage. Not manage my disorders, but how to manage my
stress.
As
we continue to move through the holiday season, I think about holiday
celebrations. I want to participate when
I can in celebrating, but celebrations are challenging, and somewhat stressful
for me. I think this is true for anyone with
various invisible disorders - vestibular, functional vision, and mental illness
just to name a few. It's easy to get
over-stimulated and overwhelmed. I've
learned that I can't be shy about making a request in order to make something
easier for myself. Please don't
question me if I do - just believe me that I am trying to get what I need in
order to take care of myself so that I am able to enjoy myself.
If
I need to take a break, I do it and don't make an issue out of it. This may mean telling someone that I need
five minutes before doing something.
I've learned that bathrooms are my friend - they are often the only
quiet space. For those who need to make
these requests, remember that there's nothing wrong with advocating for
yourself - you are not being selfish - you are taking care of yourself!
Holiday season, which means Winter Break for students
like my daughters, means that routines are more difficult to maintain. However, for various reasons, I need to maintain
at least the basics of my routines. I
try to the extent that I can, to be flexible, but I can't disrupt all of my
routines in any given day. Following
routines requires less cognitive processing, and if I don't have to THINK as
much about something, I have more energy for other things. The structure, routines of my day also help
me feel grounded because I know what to expect, and this reduces anxiety. Routines are also what keep me on task with
my rehab. This is important, because if
my body/brain gets unfamiliar with my rehab, I don't think my response will be
as good.
Another stress management skill I've been thinking about is
the concept of compartmentalization (I'll call it comp for short). Comp - to me - is about being really focused
thinking about something that's a really big, ongoing stressor. You make an appointment with yourself - let's
say for 3 p.m. for 15 min. - to think about something you need to deal with
that is causing you a lot of stress. If
making an actual appointment doesn't work, I think you can at least tell
yourself when something comes into your head, "OK, I'm going to let myself
think about this for 15 minutes, and then I'm stopping, no matter
what."
Getting too caught up in THINKING about what I need to do,
instead of actually DOING what I need to do is something that for me can be a
stressor. Thinking about rehab is good
up to a point; problem solving when something doesn't work can be
productive. But worrying a lot about my
rate of progress, or stressing out about when or how to do something is not
positive.
If I do make an appointment with myself, I might have jotted
down a word or phrase that came to mind at some point, and then during my
allotted comp time, I use that note to help me think. During my thinking time, I might do some writing,
to help myself stay focused. When my
time's up, I'm done. Whether I've
completely solved the problem or not, I stop.
Staying focused, and stopping even if I haven't solved my problem
completely will take some practice, but I'll pick it up again during whatever I
decide is my next allotted time. I may
also decide that I need to talk to Ann (VT), Joyce (FT), or my husband.
Thinking about setting a structured time to focus on a
big stressor made me notice something; thoughts come into my head fairly
frequently that are connected to something I'm stressed about. So the first step for me in this whole comp
thing was an awareness of my thought patterns.
I think when we have time on our hands, our mind looks for something to
occupy itself, which can be good, but can also be bad if we use the time for
worry. So I need to say to myself
"later," or "not now," and then find something else to
think about - or do something. Listening
to music, or thinking about something good (like my pets) is often a good way
for me to re-direct my thought process.
Finally, I recently listened to a video about meditation,
which is really - to me - about mindfulness.
The basic idea in the video is that it's actually OK - even good - for your
mind to jump around when you meditate, as long as you go back to the meditating
part. Every time you reign yourself back
in, it's good for your brain. I'm not
sure, at this point, if when I do my breathing exercises I am meditating. But I do know that when I sit and focus on my
breathing, even when my thoughts wander, I eventually feel more calm - my
sensory system does seem to settle down.
Which means I'm less tense, less stressed - and that's really what I'm
aiming for.
These observations are so helpful! Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome - thanks for letting me know!
DeleteThanks so much.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome!
Delete