I decided to share the experience of my recent
consultation with my podiatrist, Dr. W. For
one thing, I think the best way for people to understand and learn is for me to
share actual experiences, and going to a podiatrist is less of a
"typical" doctors' visit than, for example, going to an
internist. In addition, feet are pretty
important for balance. When Ron and I
arrived, we were told they were updating info and presented us with a bunch of
forms. I really prefer when doctors tell
you ahead of time there will be forms to fill out; I didn't think to ask ahead
of time about forms since I'd been there before. When forms can be downloaded so that Ron can
do them at home, it's much easier.
Because of my vision disorder, Ron always has to deal with forms.
As I said, I've been to Dr. W. before, but this was my
first time post invisible disorders.
He's a very nice guy, and also a good doctor, so in some ways I wasn't
nervous. I knew what the waiting area and
examining rooms were like, what he was like, and had an idea of what would
happen. I was pretty sure I had an
ingrown toenail, which is not just annoying, but sometimes painful. I had been putting off dealing with it, I
guess partly because it's human nature to put things off sometimes, but also
because at times I feel like I've done enough doctoring to last me a long
time. But I decided it was time to deal
with my toe before it got any worse.
I never like sitting in examining chairs, or on examining
tables because of the height; I always
feel better when my feet can touch the ground.
Tables are especially
uncomfortable because there's no arm rest either. In this case, I was on a chair. After I sat down, I just tried to get acclimated,
telling myself to breathe and that it would be OK. When Dr. W. came in, he was very cordial,
addressing me by my first name and remembering that he had met Ron at a
previous appointment. He asked me what
was going on, and I explained that I had made the mistake of using a store
bought insert in my winter boots in addition to the insole that came with the
boot. He said that was a common mistake
- and one I certainly won't make again!
A note to everyone reading....fit matters! Even if you think the trauma
to your foot is minor, over time it can cause problems. That's what happened to me, and pain or
discomfort in a toe can create walking problems - NOT something you want to
deal with if you have balance troubles.
While Dr. W and I were talking, I was thinking about what
I would say regarding my invisible disorders.
Though I've talked about wanting to use the word "vestibular"
and be understood, I personally don't like the term vestibular, because
realistically people don't know the term.
I really didn't want to have to give a complicated explanation, and
vestibular wouldn't be descriptive of my problems. I had enough to deal with just being there,
and wanted to use a word I was certain he would understand. So I
opted to say I had a balance problem, and asked him to tell me ahead of time if
the chair I was sitting on needed to be moved.
He said OK, and then asked for specifics, so I told him I had MAV, and a
vision disorder. I did not give any
further info, as I didn't think it would be helpful.
As I said, I like Dr. W.; he's got a very good bedside
manner, and explains things well. His
only misstep was that at one point when the chair was either raised or lowered
(I don't recall which) he said "This shouldn't bother you." I didn't bother saying anything, but I
thought "How do you know? You don't
really understand or know what will or won't bother me." I would have preferred if he had said
"let me know if something bothers you." While I DO hope some people who know me well,
will know that certain things bother me or are difficult, I don't expect people
to really get how I FEEL. Like a lot of
experiences, especially given how individual MAV can be and that my vision
disorder isn't super common, there's no way that someone can know exactly how I
feel. Understanding something intellectually is NOT
the same thing as experiencing something; even Ron and the girls can't really
know how I feel.
In fact, sitting on the chair while it moved DID bother
me. I have a lot of trouble with my body
experiencing motion that I am not in control of. But unlike, for example the dentist, it
really wasn't practical for the chair to move up and down without me. If a
chair back is raised or lowered, I can sit up and then lower myself into the
lowered chair, or vice versa. But in
this case, there was nothing I could do except breathe and do my best to get
through it. The worse part by far was
the electric "sander" (I don't know what its' real name is) that's
used to file down and smooth out a toenail.
I decided it was necessary for me because my traumatized toenail was so
jagged from his trimming, and so thick, and the "sanding" does make a
difference. But feeling the pressure and vibration on my
toe felt awful. It sent uncomfortable
vibrations all the way through me (no raunchy jokes please!), making me feel
like I wanted to jump straight out of the chair. I pushed through a bit and then told him I
needed to stop. Fortunately he said he'd
done enough, and put the "sander" away.
To me the biggest challenge about going to a doctor's
appointment is that I need to process whatever the doctor is telling me, but I
also have to think about management. I'm
dealing with, and coping with my invisible disorders as part of the experience,
which means a kind of multi tasking that is mentally taxing. I got through the appointment, and I was glad
I took care of a problem that thankfully was fairly simple, but it was
draining. I was tired. When Dr. W. left the room, I told Ron I
needed a couple minutes to get reorganized.
I put my shoes on to help me feel grounded, and sat in the one regular
chair in the room (Ron was now standing).
I gave myself enough time to feel like I was once again grounded enough
to go home, where I knew I could dial everything down a bit till I was ready to
move on with the rest of my day.
My personal experience is that very few doctors, including most ENT's understand inner ear issues. What has bother me the most is sitting on an examining table while the nurse takes my blood pressure. The discomfort and the dizziness usually raises my BP to unacceptable levels. If the nurse will listen to me, I ask her to take my BP again after I have had a chance to lie down on the examining table.
ReplyDeleteThe difference is remarkable.
thanks for sharing.... and certainly understanding a vision disorder is beyond them....I always try to be seated in a regular chair and do relaxing breathing during BP readings.... that seems to help
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