September 9, 2021 - One decade... be present.

It’s been a decade since I got sick. I didn’t know then, that night, that my life was dramatically changed. I’ve done therapies, and they’ve...

May 15th 2016 Trying not to get overwhelmed by seepage....

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Our basement is finished (done by a previous owner), and we use it extensively.  It's like a second floor, but underground.  So when I open the door to the basement, and see water covering much of the main room, some of it about an inch deep, it's not good.  I see furniture reflected in the water, a plastic cat toy floating like a little buoy, and Ron is barefoot in the laundry room, using our wet vac to suck up gallons and gallons of water.  Ugh... this seepage problem really sucks.  I feel tension rise in me, worrying about how bad our seepage problem will get, before it gets fixed. 

Dealing with stress has been on my mind a lot lately.  We're starting to put into motion what needs to happen in order to deal with our problem.  I feel tension about the whole situation:  how everything will come together to fix the problem, and what I don't have control over (rain, and that it's coming into our basement).  So I ask myself how I can deal with all of this.

I have to make taking care of myself even more of a priority.  This means pacing myself, trying not to plug too much into any given day or week, AND means taking breaks.  I need to do things that make me feel better, like listening to music. When I take breaks, calming breathing is a priority, so I can release some of the tension.

I can't think about what's going on ALL the time.  It won't help the situation, and only makes me feel, well, stressed out.  I need to do what I can to feel some control.  I will do my best to expedite getting the necessary permit.  Our handyman contractor, whom we've used before, said that all the prep and post project work was doable.  I will stay in touch with him, and use him as a resource.  There are a lot of pieces to this whole process.  We're more experienced homeowners than we used to be, but we've never dealt with a homeowner's project of this magnitude before.  He, on the other hand, has a lot of experience.  I can ask him questions, and get some guidance regarding the timeline.

As we move along, and I get a better idea of what needs to be done, and when what needs to happen, we can talk as a family about who pitches in where.  Delegation of responsibility can really help.  For now, using the wet vac is more difficult for me than Ron or the girls, so it's not a good use of my energy.  But I can deal with some of the clearing out and sorting, as long as I pace myself.

I need to take to heart the idea of taking things one step at a time.  In that way, it's like doing rehab; I can't get ahead of myself, and worrying about everything ahead of time won't do me any good.  I have to let some of it go - it's going to rain, and we're going to have a lot of seepage, and for now I need to live with that.  Worrying about a worst case scenario isn't going to help.

I can get more info about the Residence Inn where we'll be staying.  I will write down, as I think of them, the different pieces involved for me in staying someplace else.  One by one, I'll figure out how to deal with them.  I can get ideas from Joyce and Ann, since they both have a good understanding of my disorders, and challenges.  I'll talk with my daughters so they can figure out how to make temporarily living someplace else as manageable as possible. 

I will remind myself that as obnoxious, complex and stressful as it may be, the problem IS fixable.   We can do our best to put everything back together in better shape than it is now.  We'll get a new - long overdue - kitchen floor.  Since we'll be out of the house anyway, and spending a significant chunk of change on the basement, we figured why not get it done.

Some of what we have to do is no different than any other family dealing with a major homeowners problem/project.  I will, however, deal with challenges that are unique to me because of my vestibular and vision disorders, challenges that feel very big to me.  Our house already feels different because of the seepage, so my environment is already different, and there will probably begin to be disruption to my routines. That makes me anxious and uncomfortable.  So I keep breathing, and keep moving. I'll  attempt to keep my sense of humor, and tell myself, "We'll get through this, and I'll get through this."




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