September 9, 2021 - One decade... be present.

It’s been a decade since I got sick. I didn’t know then, that night, that my life was dramatically changed. I’ve done therapies, and they’ve...

July 10th 2015 My 4th of July outing....

NOTE: Please cut and paste into Google Translate to listen if needed.

Fireworks are definitely not for me anymore for multiple reasons, but our community has a long tradition of celebration for Independence Day called Family Days, and I like to do something to participate.  So I go to Jewett Park - the main park facility in the center of town - and walk around with Ron and the girls, and our dog Cosmo, to see the booths.  It's like a mini Fine Arts Festival, which I attended with Ron and the girls, and Cosmo over Memorial Day weekend.  I really enjoy being able to do something for the 4th, and being able to include our dog is a real bonus - he loves it!

We talked beforehand about how to handle the logistics, because Ron and the girls like to go to the Pancake Breakfast, and then the parade which starts at noon.  Watching the parade is still not quite within my grasp, on top of walking around, and needing to have lunch.  However, parking gets very tricky the closer it gets to parade time, so Cara came up with a plan; the three of them would pick me up after breakfast, I would bring Cosmo, and walk around the park with them, and then Cosmo and I would go home.  This would leave the girls free to go watch the parade.  Ron was marching with a group for a political candidate, so he wouldn't walk around that much with us, but the girls and I enjoy the booths.  It's always a chance to get some creative jewelry.  The new challenge for me this year was the final piece of the plan - that I would walk home on my own with Cosmo.

Jewett Park was, of course, busy - there was music playing and lots of people milling around, especially since the weather had cooperated.  It was beautiful out.  Ron walked a bit, and then left to get to where the parade begins.  The girls and I did a couple loops around the Family Days booths.  The Fine Arts booths were on either side of a wide two way street, as well as a small parking lot.  Booths for Family Days are in Jewett Park, for the most part on opposite sides of a sidewalk.  Spatially, this isn't really good or bad compared to the Fine Arts booths, just different.  There are always fewer Family Days booths, so visually that's easier, because I'm simply looking at fewer displays.  Walking from one booth to another is different than walking down a sidewalk, but I tell myself it's just that - different - but it's still walking, and I take daily walks with Cosmo and Leena.

What's probably more challenging for me is actually looking at whatever is on display at each booth.  Scanning trays or wracks of jewelry, glassware, or artwork requires a lot of tracking and eye gaze switching.  There's also the visual component of how much of my periphery to pay attention to, and making quick decisions about when to makes switches.   And of course, in addition to looking at items on display, I'm interacting with Leena and Cara, and making sure I don't walk into anyone or anything.

Cosmo was having a wonderful time, and people kept asking Cara where she got her face painted.  This was a compliment, since she'd done her face - as well as Leena's - at home.  We looked at the various jewelry booths, and then went back to the ones we really liked that were within our price range.  We made our purchases, chatting a bit with the vendors - one of whom remembered me from last year - and then wandered a bit more, no longer concentrating on jewelry.  I love to see the creativity on display at art fairs, and I wonder sometimes if either of the girls will ever have a booth of their own. 

By close to 11:30 a.m. I was getting tired, and knew that, as much as I miss the parade (this is the fourth one I've missed), I'd made the right decision not to include it in my plans.  The girls walked with me (and Cosmo) to the edge of the park and thus festivities, and then across the train tracks, so that I was past the bulk of the crowd, and then said goodbye.  I started for home with Cosmo.  I don't often walk Cosmo by myself; it adds a visual component to do an entire walk with him on my own, and I like to be able to hand over the leash if I feel like I'm pushing it.  But I had wanted to bring Cosmo, and I needed to bring him home. 

Getting home from Jewett Park, the walk was a bit longer, I think, than I typically do.   Cosmo did not want to leave the girls - and everyone - behind.  As soon as he realized we were going the opposite direction, he stopped.  Thankfully, he did not dig in his heels as he occasionally does, and with a bit of coaxing, I was able to get him moving.  This scenario repeated itself whenever he saw people going towards the parade, so I opted to go down a different street.  I hadn't walked down it for a long time, so it felt a bit new to me, but there were a lot less people, so I managed to get him going.  Handling the leash was a little bit tricky; he was moving around, so I had to either turn my body around, which can be difficult from a balance perspective, or switch which hand had the leash, and which had my water bottle.  This, again, was a visual/vestibular challenge - walking and coordinating my hand movements.

I felt tired, but also determined, and I told myself I could do it, and Cosmo and I walked.  I was grateful when I knew I'd done the amount that was the extra part, and once I got home, very tired, I could say that I'd done it.  I sat for a while doing nothing; no lights on, no noises, just breathing and drinking water.  I was grateful I'd had the forethought to prepare my lunch ahead of time, so I only had to pull it out of the fridge.  I ate, played a little very easy free form on my flute, did a couple odds and ends, and then lay down.  Tired yes, but pleased that I'd succeeded at meeting my challenge.





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