When you have a
complicated health history - as I do - figuring out which pieces make sense can
be tricky. I took the opportunity to try
to untangle things a bit, and gain some clarity in my CBT session today with
Christina. It was helpful and I thought
I would share some of it –
1) Christina pointed out
that the brain MRI I had one month after my illness was normal, & that I
didn't have - nor do I have - cognitive impairment.
2) Cheri is very good at
what she does - auditory integration training, Dr. Margolis recommended her -
but she's not a doctor, which means she's not in a position to make a diagnosis.
Christina recommended that I talk to Dr.
M., share what Cheri has talked about with me, & see what his thoughts are
on my doing AIT.
Since I'm not scheduled
to see Dr. M for another month, I emailed him to see if I can talk to him on
the phone before that. In my email, I
explained that I had spoken with Cheri, done her online assessment, &
wanted to talk about it with him.
3) Christina & I
agreed that seeing an ENT who understands vestibular issues (as opposed to a surgeon,
like the ENT I actually saw after my hearing test), to talk about the results
of my hearing test, would make sense.
4) I don't know for sure
if the neurologist I'm scheduled to see in September will think a sleep study
is warranted. My sleep IS much better than it used to be, & likely a major
factor in why I've been doing better with all my therapies.
5) Cheri wants to be thorough,
which is good, but my Anxiety is getting triggered because she's pointing out
all kinds of "what ifs?". I
need to keep in mind type 1 worry (actual problem) vs type 2 (possible).
The reality is that I'll
never be able to know for sure what happened to me the night I got sick. It may indeed make sense for me to do some auditory
integration training, & taking a break from VT when I do that, would make
sense.
6) I don't have VT this
week (Thurs. is July 4th), so when I see Ann on the 11th (by which time
hopefully I'll have spoken with Dr. M.), I'll talk to her about what schedule
makes sense for me.
7) I also need to find
out when I can get acoustic testing for both ipsilateral and contralateral
(ear) reflexes. I will ask about this
when I called to schedule the ENT appointment.
Ipsilateral is the
reflex that works when that same side is stimulated, and contralateral is the reflex
that works when the opposite side receives the stimulation. By Feldenkrais practitioner, Joyce, said that
she is going to see what she can find out that might help me.
And now it's time for
another list -
- opening my text, and
calling the taxi driver this morning to confirm that he was on his way
- calling the anxiety
treatment center to let them know I was running a few minutes late, but was on
my way
- recognizing when PTSD
anxiety flares up, reminding myself that the goal is for it to diminish over
time, not completely disappear
- walking my dog by
myself is actually now an enjoyable activity
- I look around much
more when I'm out walking
- it's useful to recognize
a problem, but it's also useful to acknowledge what's good - no one, including
myself, gets extra credit for focusing on the negative
- I'm trying to listen
to, share music that makes me smile, & listen to audio books that help me
learn, or feel good
- writing this post!
