September 9, 2021 - One decade... be present.

It’s been a decade since I got sick. I didn’t know then, that night, that my life was dramatically changed. I’ve done therapies, and they’ve...

September 9, 2021 - One decade... be present.

It’s been a decade since I got sick. I didn’t know then, that night, that my life was dramatically changed. I’ve done therapies, and they’ve all helped, but I’m not totally “fixed.” I’ve had tremendous loss. But I also have a lot to be grateful for. The loss and gratitude are two sides of the same life. And there’s a lot in between those two sides. 

So, I try to stay in the present. One day at a time. Focus on what I have control over. Problem-solve when I need to. Do the best I can. Be aware of what I have done, and can do. Try not to take the good things for granted. 

Enjoy my pets, being able to take walks, staying connected to friends and family through the wonders of technology. One day at a time. Be present.

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June 23, 2021 - It takes practice - focusing on the positive


Really paying attention to the positive – regardless of how large or small – takes practice. Some days are easier than others, but if I can’t do it one day, that doesn’t mean I throw in the towel. It means keep trying.


I have limitations, disabilities, challenges – I really don’t know which word/meaning makes the most sense. I don’t think it matters. What I DO know is that if I focus on all of that, it’s overwhelming. Immobilizing. Really bad for me.


It’s incredibly easy to think of something I miss, or would like to be able to do still/again, and end up feeling really sad, even angry. I know it’s important to let myself feel the difficulties, but it’s also incredibly important to make myself notice the positive.


And yes, sometimes – more frequently than I’d like – I DO have to push myself to pay attention to, appreciate what’s good.


So, here’s a few examples (and I’ll be posting more examples on my Visible Person, Invisible Problem Facebook page):


Being functional at home – this is an easy one for me to overlook, but it’s really important. Taking care of myself, and running our household matters a great deal. A huge accomplishment.


Playing my flute – this is a really good example of needing to focus on the playing I’m currently able to do, rather than what I’ve lost.


Taking walks – I can actually take walks by myself now, if I have to. This is actually a really major accomplishment for me.


Well, this is a good start for me. I’m going to practice this, so I can get my brain into a different groove, as much as possible. Hopefully, with practice, I’ll achieve this goal.


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March 29, 2021 - Focus on - fully embrace - what I CAN do


I have limitations because of my invisible disorders, and those limitations mean that I am disabled. Some people seem afraid to use that word – “disabled” – but it’s my truth. It is only in accepting this truth, this reality, that I can embrace what I AM able to do. I still have abilities and interests, and both – my disabilities AND my abilities – make up “me” now.

So, what are some of my abilities now?


What my reading (near vision) glasses enable me to do –

I’m grateful that I can read to some degree, and my reading glasses – which have prism as part of the prescription – are hugely helpful. As limited as my reading is, I can’t imagine not being able to read at ALL. My reading glasses also, of course, enable me to write. And enable me to watch videos.


Make music –

I’ve talked about my flute, but I also do a bit of piano keyboard. We have an electric, full scale piano keyboard. I never learned to play - I can’t read Bass Clef – but I’m slowly getting more acquainted with making music on our piano. I’ve experimented with very simple chords, and occasionally using both hands.


Grow houseplants-

My mother loved gardening – it was a passion of hers. I’m nowhere near as knowledgeable as she was, but I do seem to have a green thumb for houseplants. I keep it simple – sunlight, and the right amount of water, and then get around to re-potting when needed. Here’s a few of them.


Outdoor garden -

I love our garden, and delight in seeing things beginning to grow in the Spring. Springtime has always been my favorite season. I also love to spot flowers when my husband Ron and I are out for our daily afternoon walk with our dog. When I’m close enough, I take pictures of the flowers.

Last summer I sent them to family members, including my mom. She loved getting them, and I know she’d be happy that I’m still taking pictures of flowers. I’ll always think of her when I’m taking pleasure in nature, and I know that would make her happy.

Focus on abilities -

So, these are some of the things I CAN do. The life I’m trying to embrace. I want, as much as I can, to be present, and to treasure each and every moment of goodness.


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